Issue #9, Spring 1997

Grr...

You know, I'm pretty harsh in my judgements of myself and the world around me. And as much as I try to be accepting and understanding and full of sweetness and light, I am constantly frustrated by the vast and incomprehensible stupidity of people in general.

Generally, folks seem pretty dumb these days. Now, averaging it out, I'd expect most people are average. Which would suggest that I could happen upon any person at any given time and they'd be of average intelligence and so on. Maybe that's so, but I'm worried that it's not.

On the computer, for example, stupidity is gaining hold. In the early days, if you met someone who was using a computer, you could assume some intelligence on his or her part, because back then, computers were built and used by hobbyists. Even in the days when "user-friendly" became a catchy phrase, you still had to know more than "a thing or two" to get by. You had to be pretty smart, or at the very least, clever. That's not the case anymore.

Now any moron with a free hand can get on the Internet. And they do. Thousands of them, every fall and every January, with the new class of students at Universities. And more morons sign up to service providers every day. I come from the 'old school' of computer chat -- figuring that people who chat on computers are pretty bright (see above). But now, nearly all the people I run into on IRC (Internet Relay Chat, the "CB channels" of the Internet) are so utterly stupid, naive and pathetic that I wonder how they get by in day-to-day life. Perhaps I shouldn't be so harsh -- I write daily in a business that demands requests proper grammar and spelling. But I see an overwhelming majority of people saying "to" instead of "too" ... "there" instead of "they're" .. "u" instead of "you" ... "looser" instead of "loser" and so on and so on. They try to pass it off as a typo, but when idiot upon idiot can't type out a single line of text without some mistake in the most basic grammar or spelling, that goes way beyond your frisky fingers hitting the wrong keys. That, my cyber-amigo, means you are horribly undereducated.

And after seeing this over and over again -- after seeing the collective IQ of the once-hard-to-grasp-and-even-harder-to-negotiate Internet plummet with the advent of Netscape and flat-rate access -- it doesn't calm me anymore to just say "Well, I'm better than them. I'm glad I'm not that stupid." Now it just irritates me and frustrates me until I have to just shut down the program before I start cutting into everyone about how pathetic and illiterate they all are.

I mentioned the "CB channels" analogy earlier on. This isn't an original comparison, but it bears repeating. I think the Internet is following somewhat the same path as CB radio did in the 70's. In the early days, most folks who used CB's either built the radios themselves, or knew them inside and out. They know all the 10-codes, all the jargon, all the rules and regulations. They were radio enthusiasts -- a tight-knit community, and it was just fine with them. The conversations were (relatively) high in quality, because those participating were passionate and really knew their shit. Then CB became popular and cheaper. Any dick who wanted a CB set could get one and get on the air with no training. So they did. Lots of 'em. And they filled up the airwaves with inane, pointless chatter. A bunch of untrained idiots talking about nothing. They crowded out the folks who knew their shit, and so the good guys left. Eventually all that was left were a bunch of empty-headed morons and a few straggling die-hards. The morons found other morons dull, got frustrated and left. The good guys, fed up with the newbies, had already gone. Now where's CB radio?

Isn't the Internet the same way? Originally run by scientists and educators. Recently discovered by everyday folk and businessmen. Now it's being flooded with ads and clueless newbies. The die-hards who knew it and loved it before the World Wide Web are leaving. Eventually all the newbies are going to realize they're there for no particular reason, to talk about nothing, with no background knowledge. They'll move on. Either that or the whole thing will get flooded and just collapse upon itself. Bah.

Now you understand why Internet folks hate AOL.